Fun With Headlines

Drudge:  [Warren] Buffett Says Worst of Crisis Over for Wall Street, Individuals May Suffer…

The worst is over.  Now it’s only the regular schmuck suffering.  I’m so relieved.

CNS:  Clinton Library Won’t Release Berger Documents

But Sandy Berger has already shown that he can extract documents from places with far stricter security than the Clinton Massage Parlor.

KSDK:  Clay Aiken: ‘I’m Not Trying to be Justin Timberlake’

I’m not trying to be Justin Timberlake either.  Where’s my KSDK story?

P-D:  Arsonist may be to blame for series of fires

Really, an arsonist is behind fires?  I always look for an embezzler when there are fires.

Chuck Norris in WND:  Thomas Jefferson’s financial advice

Yet, Chuck Norris passed on Jeffersonite Ron Paul for Mike Huckabee.

AP:  Study: Restaurant tobacco bans influence teen smoking

They also influence adult smoking.

Reuters:  Los Angeles man wins right to use wife’s last name

I’ve heard of hen pecked, but this is ridiculous.

Politico:  Clinton: OPEC ‘can no longer be a cartel’

I’m sure Saudi oil barons are scared of someone they would put in a burqua.

Politico:  Hispanics may put Fla. in play for Dems

Hispanics vote Dem?  Don’t anyone tell McCain, RNC, Stupid Party, WSJ, or they might pout.

AFP:  Microsoft can do it without Yahoo: Ballmer

Really?  Then why did you want to spend $44bn to do “it” with Yahoo, whatever “it” is?