P-D Race: Is “white trash” a racist expression?
Yeah, and also the unofficial motto of Jefferson County.
P-D Tech: Have you considered switching Web browsers?
No, I’m happy with Firefox.
P-D: Mo. AG to investigate Office Depot
When asked by the media for the reason, Chris Koster said that he was “takin’ care of business.”
P-D: Mo GOP calls Sec of State Carnahan “a Caroline Kennedy echo”
Well, the analogy doesn’t quite hold, because at least Mrs. Antolinez thought she had to ride her dead father to at least one lesser public office before becoming a U.S. Senator, that’s more than I can say for Mrs. Schlossberg.
P-D: Quinn’s coming-out party in D.C.
I hope that means he’s gay, otherwise he wants to pick your pocket.
IHT: Republican [National Committee] leader vows to mix it up with Obama
They’ll have a big fight on the one issue they disagree about.
CNS: Boxer Says House Will ‘Follow the Science’ on Global Warming Legislation
But not on racial equality legislation, there they’ll continue to believe in superstitious fads instead of racial differences.
CNS: Herbie Hancock Willing to Serve as Obama’s Secretary of Culture
He might get the job if it doesn’t go to Herbie the Car.
P-D: Donations poured in after last year’s Kirkwood shootings
Any money from cookie bake sales?
KSDK: 5 elementary school boys found with heroin, thought it was candy
But later learned it was Afghanistan’s GDP.
KSDK: Fans of Texas school decide to cheer for opposing team
This is high school football in Texas we’re talking about here. I prefer my organs, but someone else’s will do in a pinch.
KSDK: Diverse group to advise faith-based office
If the group is truly diverse, then it has to include some atheists and agnostics.
SIL: Saluki football team expects to sign plenty of high school players
Who else but high schoolers would a college football team sign?
Reuters: Kyrgyzstan starts moves to close U.S. airbase
Good, because we don’t need military bases in countries we can’t pronounce or spell correctly.
Politico: [Barney] Frank to bankers: People hate you
So saith Mr. Congeniality.
Politico: The lonely life of conservative comics
Screw that, I’m having more fun than ever. After all, what would Voltaire have been without his Paris?
News Factor Network: AOL Picks Former Yahoo Executive To Lead Ad Sales
Pardon me, but wouldn’t this be like Bernie Madoff hiring Ken Lay to run his accounting department?
AP/Obama: Do you know where your kid is? Check Google’s maps
The frightening this is that you don’t, but Larry and Sergey do.
AP/Obama: Dope-smoking among teens down in many countries
The abstinence message is getting through: That they should abstain from smoking weed until they have either an Olympic gold medal or an NFL contract.
Reuters: Methamphetamine use costs U.S. $23 billion a year
Imagine, the tax money that could have been collected from this productivity could have funded a whole water slide park on the outskirts of Podunkville.
AP/Obama: Man celebrates birthday with 24-hour treadmill run
“It seems like one of the gym employees came up to me 23 hours and 30 minutes ago that my time is up.”
Take Two: AP/Obama: Man celebrates birthday with 24-hour treadmill run
And got a warning from the staff when he forgot to spray off the treadmill with the disinfectant spritz bottle.
Take Three: AP/Obama: Man celebrates birthday with 24-hour treadmill run
If he spent 24 hours on the treadmill, I hope for his sake that he followed it up with the world’s longest shower.
