Laughin’ At My Generation

WNYW-Fox-5 NYC:  13 Year Old Commits To USC

Football journalists and insiders speculate that he might forgo his last year of middle school eligibility.

KSDK:  Men walk out of Schnucks, Walgreens with more than a thousand dollars in merchandise

It’s easy to spend five hundred clams apiece at Schnucks and Walgreens in one day, with what food and drugs cost.

P-D:  Human body parts found in Chicago trash

Somebody probably didn’t want them anymore.  The kids probably got bored with ‘em, and there was no room.

KSDK:  Washington University assault victim improves; school releases safety video

Thug has gun, victim has video.  Guess who wins.

Idolator:  Taylor Swift Named The “Voice Of A Generation” By President Of Her Label

I was all set to laugh at that generation, until I found my birth certificate.

St. Charles Journal:  NEW: Longtime Howell North hall monitor dies – Albert Preston, 90, watched school’s corridors for 15 years

Three cheers for Francis Howell North High School.  You’re so tranquil and quiet that an octogenarian can patrol it.

P-D:  Next ‘Idol’ judge: Howard Stern?

I’m waiting for the first time he demands that Ellen DeGeneres flashes her boobs.  I’m waiting for the first time that he demands that Randy Jackson flashes his boobs.

Bring Her On

Will President Obama haul out the First Lady in a new attempt to rejuvenate his moribund domestic policy initiatives?

Three words:  Bring it on.

If they think they’re gonna get the sympathy of white women by trucking out someone whose affirmative action sinecure do-nothing job salary tripled because her husband won an election, more power to them.

Don’t Let a Good Crisis Go to Waste

Portugal’s financial system is falling apart.

I’m sure some of you are wondering if there is a nationalist political party there that could be the big political winners in this calamity.

The answer is yes.  It’s called the Partido Nacional Renovador (PNR), or “National Renewal Party” in English.  It does not hold any seats in the Portuguese Parliament right now, but should it become a majority, Portugal’s new Prime Minister would be José Pinto-Coelho.  The PNR has borrowed the French Front National’s flame logo, and has also borrowed the “black sheep white sheep” ads from the SVP in Switzerland.  Borrowing St. George’s Cross from the BNP would be a bridge too far, though :)

Cherish Is The Word

Maine Public Broadcasting:

Democratic Candidates Differ on Gun Background Checks

(snip)

Right now in Maine, if you buy a gun at a store like L.L. Bean or Cabela’s you have to undergo a criminal background check. But if you buy a gun from a friend, or from a private seller at a gun show, or through an ad in Uncle Henry’s, no background check is performed. Background checks are designed to keep guns out of the hands of illegal immigrants, underage children and those convicted of a felony or domestic violence assault.

“I think that it’s important that someone who’s turned down for a purchase of a firearm can’t turn around and buy it at some other venue,” says Rosa Scarcelli, who runs an affordable housing business and is a Democratic candidate for governor.

She says she was surprised to learn that she’s the only Democrat in the governor’s race in favor of mandatory criminal background checks on all firearms purchases. “I thought it was a common sense measure and one that certainly should be part of our party’s position and I think it’s important that we show leadership on this issue.”

(snip)

He says a law requiring background checks on all firearms sales is unenforceable and unnecessary. “Maine has the highest gun ownership per capita in the country, but it is also the second safest state in the country,” McGowan says. “So when we look at those issues of gun ownership and gun purchases, just remember that from the day Maine was started, people have been buying and selling and trading guns back and forth, it’s part of the rural economy.”

You have the second safest state in the country, partially because you have the highest gun ownership per capita in the country, but more so that Maine is 97% white.  But you’re not going to have a the second safest state much longer, because the black population, mainly Somali “refugees,” have increased the state’s black population by more than a third between 2000 and 2005.

BTW, I have my doubts about Maine being the most gun-owning state in the union.  Compared to Texas?

Drafting For Potential

I referenced this story earlier today, albeit in a more jocular manner.  It’s the one about the 13-year old 7th grade quarterback committing to USC a full five football seasons before he graduates from high school.

In June 1995′s NBA Draft, Kevin Garnett was the first high school basketball player to go directly to the professional ranks in a very long time.  He had some success in his rookie campaign with the Minnesocold Timberpuppies, and that led to a lot more high school seniors coming out for the NBA the next draft, in 1996.  That was the draft class where Kobe Bryant and Jermaine O’Neal made the direct jump, and on top of that, an inordinate number of college freshmen and sophomores came out, including #1 pick Allen Iverson.  (My roommate the following two semesters was a huge Georgetown fan, and I couldn’t get through one day w/o him telling me about Iverson being the first Georgetown player under John Thompson Jr. to come out early.)  It was also the first draft where white players from Europe started showing up on the boards.

The rationales given by team GMs and talent scouts for drafting men that young were utterly ridiculous.  Most of it revolved around drafting for potential rather than reputation and proven ability.  At about the time of the ’96 draft, Chiquita Bananas ran a commercial showing a teenage boy, no older than 13 it seemed, constantly shooting hoops in his driveway.  The jist of the ad was that Chiquita’s bananas would give you the energy and nutrition to develop into a better athlete.  I called Kevin Slaten, who at the time was on KSD (now KTRS), and told him that the NBA should draft the Chiquita banana boy for his far future potential rather than his proven ability.  Slaten doesn’t LOL very often, but he did at that.

So now I find out that a 13-year old is already verbally committing to USC.  While USC isn’t professional football (in theory, ahem Reggie Bush), it’s as professional as Los Angeles has these days.

Perhaps I ought to stop making jestful predictions.