Sixth Month of Recovery

31 01 2018

Your Blogmeister’s Secret Hideout

I am finally picking up the pieces of my life in a significant way.

Now that my short term memory is starting to be restored, and a lot of things are coming back to me, I can finally start fitting a lot of heretofore loose pieces together in the zillion piece box puzzle that is my life.  Even though physical or cognitive improvement did not accompany memory restoration, the memory restoration alone made this a really good month.  Mainly because I can now start seriously anticipating and predicating something of a future for myself, even if it will necessarily come with reduced expectations, reduced compared to what I had on the afternoon of July 19 of last year, and even if whatever functional future lies ahead of me isn’t in the very near future.

The cloud to that silver lining is that now I’m beginning to become all the more aware of how far behind I am in terms of cognitive function.  It’s not as if I didn’t already realize this, but until now, I didn’t know how bad it was.  I’m reading some of my own posts here since mid-November, and from that, I can now see that I don’t have the same level of sustained cogency, sharpness and brilliance that I had before July 19.  That’s yet another matter of if-and-when/hurry up and wait.

Another drawback is that I’m suffering the same kind of anxiety now that I did in the immediate days and weeks after my return to functional coherence in mid-November, that I think that subsequent and drastic improvements are immediately impending, when I know from experience that it’s going to take a lot of time, and anticipating way too much ahead of reality is only going to make me depressed.  I really have to live one day at a time.

Yet another hitch is that the last several days have been worse than the January usual for pain.  But that’s just one of those things that is going to come and go, and hopefully over time, will do more going than coming.  One other lingering symptom that I don’t think I’ve even brought up here is my slightly but noticeably enough slurred speech — I am told that after the accident, it was very noticeably slurred, improved quite a bit to the point of my return to functional coherence, but that’s when it stopped improving, and has not at all improved in the last two and a half months.

One piece of personal news is that my lease on my Richmond Heights apartment is up on March 1.  My rent was all paid up until then, thanks to certain interested and generous people, and there would otherwise be no problem with it continuing past March 1.  The problem is that because of the continuing even if declining risk of unconsciousness events, and that I’m still semi-ambulatory, and my continued unsteady brain-motor control means I can’t drive a car, all this rolled together means I can’t live on my own or even be alone for very long.  Which means that if I did want to re-up for another year, I would have no idea when I’d be able to live there.  Furthermore, the property management firm’s chief operating munchkin would much rather prefer someone both paying rent for the unit and actually living in the unit, that much I can understand.  Which means that some time in February, my uncle will hire some movers to put my stuff into the family storage bin.  And the secret hideout will be my official address for awhile.

It’s like this:




3 responses

31 01 2018
Life Takes a Bite Out of Your Blogmeister (Pinned Post, Newer Content Follows Below) | Countenance Blog

[…] Sixth Month of Recovery — January was a good month […]

1 02 2018
Sixth Month of Recovery — Countenance Blog – Homosapien Online Marketing

[…] via Sixth Month of Recovery — Countenance Blog […]

3 02 2018

When I was a kid, you could tell where the party was by riding around with the windows down and listening for the kid with the 300w stereo and column speakers in the back yard playing that piece. Let this version play in the background while you’re working for a while :)

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